stop the world for me now.

2009-09-26T02:05:00.001+08:00

It's not a good thing that I'm here again tonight. :S Yups, sometimes I really do want my own way. :( I've no idea what I want or what I'm thinking laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. :( I'm just paranoid tonight. So right now, maybe I shld sing 'God will make a way'.

Almost here.

2009-09-07T23:02:00.001+08:00

I think I want to change blog URL soon. Can someone give me some suggestions?

Almost here

Did I hear you right
'Cause I thought you said
Let's think it over

You have been my life
And I never planned
Growing old without you

Shadows bleeding through the light
Where a love once shined so bright
Came without a reason

Don't let go on us tonight
Love's not always black and white
Haven't I always loved you?

But when I need you
You're almost here
And I know that's
Not enough
But when I'm with you
I'm close to tears
'Cause you're only almost here

I would change the world
If I had a chance
Oh won't you let me

Treat me like a child
Throw your arms around me
Please protect me

Bruised and battered by your words
Dazed and shattered how it hurts
Haven't I always loved you

But when I need you
You're almost here
And I know that's
Not enough
But when I'm with you
I'm close to tears
'Cause you're only almost here

Bruised and battered by your words
Dazed and shattered now it hurts
Haven't I always loved you

But when I need you, you're almost here
(Well I never knew how far behind I'd left you)
And when I hold you, you're almost here
(Well I'm sorry that I took our love for granted)
(Now I'm with you, I'm close to tears
'Cause I know I'm almost here)
Only almost here

Am I really almost here? :(

2009-08-25T20:44:00.002+08:00

To: Dearest You.

Thanks for everything you've done. I will really hold all the memories in my heart dearly. Also, year 3 became much more meaningful with you around. Thanks for being my Yoon Ji Hoon forever. I will always have your back and you're certainly important to me, my soul mate. That's a lifetime promise.

P.S. You have to bash my Gu Jun Pyo next time okay. :P

2009-08-23T14:49:00.002+08:00

I'm upset. Why must I hurt people like this again and again? :( Why?! I'm not worthy, really.

2009-08-19T01:16:00.002+08:00

I'm tired of leading a double life. :S

School's good but I miss my woman badly. Really badly! Will post something more meaningful soon. Hehe.

I don't know you
But I want you
All the more for that
Words fall through me
And always fool me
And I can't react
And games that never amount
To more than they're meant
Will play themselves out

P.S. I miss the Joongbo couple so much. :(

2009-08-01T17:09:00.000+08:00

I'm nothing but a normal human. I can't please everyone at the same time. Let me go. Sorry.

2009-07-29T00:37:00.001+08:00

Went for floorball training with Hui Jun. :( So tiring pleaseeeeeeeeee. But Daddy was so nice, he volunteered to fetch me home! :)

I don't want to be a damn bimbo who knows nothing at all. Tests are coming and I'm not prepared! Zzzzzzzzzzzzz.

2009-07-25T02:20:00.001+08:00

I feel further and further away. :( Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

I'm such a hxxxx xxxxxxx.

2009-07-21T23:42:00.001+08:00

Nobody (english) - Wonder Girls

It has been a long while since I last came here. Had my busy periods and days haha but well, at the same time, I had lots of time to bum around the house too. Life is perfect,at least right now. I do miss my poly days and HR clique. Everyone seems to be moving on to somewhere, be it army, working, uni, I still want the best for all my loved ones. Especially, Jasmine Lin, Eileen, Nezeem, Jane, Maureen, Pei Ling, Jasper, Daniel, Clement, the whole TB22 and the HR clique. <3

I want to do so many things. Like watching all the downloaded shows in my Veoh library, change my blog skin, blog more often, pack my room zzz, learning back Guzheng and Zhong Ruan. (I do need a good teacher, so if anyone happens to know any, fb me! or sms me okay! ).

Will try to update more pics when I feel more like it! LOL.

2009-05-30T03:39:00.002+08:00

The reason why I'm still online so late at night is because of this:

LYRICS :

VERSE 1:
Because I'm so stupid and such a fool
My eyes don't see nobody but you
Even though I know you love someone else
You could never know the pain that I felt
Oh oh oh

VERSE 2:
You probably never think of me at all
And I know we have no memories
But the one who really wants you is me
In the end only my tears will fall

BRIDGE 1:
I stay, you walk away
I stand back, watching you day by day
You can't see that I'm so in love with you
Like the wind you just fly right through (ohhhhh)

CHORUS 1 :
There are days when I just miss you so much
There are days when I just long for your touch
"I love you" somehow flies right off my lips and so
Once again I'm left crying for you
Once again I'm left here missing you
Baby I love you I'm waiting for you

VERSE 3:
You'll probably never have a dream of me
And I know I'm in love all alone
That's why we don't really have memories
In the end, I'll make them all on my own

BRIDGE 2:
Love's like a river of tears
That will flow whenever you're not here
Even though your heart will never be mine
It's enough just seeing you smile

CHORUS 2:
There are days when I see nothing but rain
There are days when I just feel so much pain
"I miss you" somehow flies right off my lips and so
Once again I'm left wishing for you
Once again I'm left here missing you
Baby I love you I'm waiting for you

VERSE 4:
Bye, bye, never say goodbye
Even though it's not me by your side
I need you , I just can't say it but I want you
I cannot stop wishing for you

CHORUS 3:
There are days when I just miss you so much
There are days when I just long for your touch
"I love you" somehow flies right off my lips and so
Once again I'm left crying for you
There are days when I see nothing but rain
There are days when I just feel so much pain
"I miss you" somehow flies right off my lips and so
Once again I'm left wishing for you
Once again I'm left here missing you
Baby I love you I'm waiting for you

Tell me how not to like it.

P.S.
ajing naye ma-eu-meul mollado
ggeutnae seu-chideushi gado

I miss it, I really do.

2009-03-22T22:00:00.000+08:00

Making a lover by SS501 ♡

애인만들기 (Making a Lover) Aein man deul gi - SS501

i shout to the world, i love you, that i love you
for you to become my girl
dazzling, always you're my star
i'll protect you
i can always be waiting for you

at the end of an exhausting day, the one person who makes me laugh
at the end of a hard life, the one person to welcome me
i start a new day again, bringing up your pretty smile

i'm happier than anyone else if i'm by your side
under that sky, i promise you
i'll give everything to you

i shout to the world, i love you, that i love you
for you to become my girl
dazzling, always you're my star
i'll protect you
i can always be waiting for you

what took you so long to come to me? i feel like i have the world
thank you, my only angel. i love you like the first time
under that sky, i promise you
i want all of you

i shout to the world, i love you, that i love you
for you to become my girl
dazzling, always you're my star
i'll protect you
i can always be waiting for you

let's just promise one thing. swearing under the sky
i'll love you until the day the sun burns up and disappears, oh my love

i pray that you'll allow me, accept me as your man
i promise you that my heart won't change until the day i die
i can always be waiting for you
baby, i will forever with you
forever, i'll love only you

♥♥♥

2009-03-13T11:26:00.003+08:00

I am a very happy girl! :) Hehe. I have been working and tuition-ing, and the cycle goes on over and over again everyday. Despite this hectic lifestyle, I'm enjoying life like never before. :) But I miss school and my mean girls (Eileen & Nezeem). Now that Jasmine and Jasper are back, I feel completed. :) But both of them are not dating me out la! :S Haha bye everyoneeeeez :)

2009-03-05T00:08:00.001+08:00

It just makes me feel so upset that you no longer understand me as much. :( Or am I expecting too much?

2009-02-23T14:07:00.000+08:00

Jasmine is coming back today. (: I guess I can finally change my msn nick! :)

It's a pity that I can't get down to the airport personally to fetch her. =/ Nvm I guess I will be seeing her and a few others in school tmr! Woohoo <3 Also, it brings us even closer to the end of our poly life. The closure seems to be nearer and nearer. :( Alrights back to studying! <3

2009-02-18T14:25:00.002+08:00

Starlight tears

별빛눈물 - 김유경

I've lots of pictures to update, but after exams! :) HEHE. <3333

P.S. Fall in love with 'Starlight tears' after watching Boys over Flowers. :( Love Lee Min Ho a lot though. <3333

2009-02-10T19:57:00.002+08:00

I really want rosessssssssssssssss. :( I want Jasmine Lin to give me roses. :( On a brighter note, she'd be back by 27th or 28th. <3

2009-02-03T16:26:00.003+08:00

I don't know the purpose of having this blog anymore. :( Tsk, nothing to update except projects projects projects.

Last semester really makes me :( :( :(

Awwwwwwwwwwwww, nvm I shall upload some HR Microsoft trip pictures! :)

Will update more when I'm back at night.

2009-01-24T23:38:00.002+08:00

I did the personality test on Jasmine Tan's blog. :)

Your view on yourself:
You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education:
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

I find it 90% true, especially this part 'You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.' and this 'You like serious, smart and determined people.'

People who know me well will know, I'm a sucker for smart people. :( Smart guys and girls! I love smart people, probably because I ain't one. HEHE. :)

May fate lead me to you, the right you. :)

2009-01-24T22:50:00.006+08:00

I'm sorry. I promise to myself, tonight is the last time. This is really the last night I'll do such a thing. :( I'm sorry, awfully sorry. This is the 3 words I can offer to you, I can't give any more. You have to stay away from me. It's for your own good, believe me. Or rather for our own good. I still want you, as my soul mate for life...

DON'T ASK ME WHO IS IT FOR. If you know, that's good. Just don't ask, I'd get really mad.I mean it. FULL STOP.

2009-01-22T13:56:00.002+08:00

I'm sitting alone at Convention Underpass, waiting for Clement to end his AOW class. :( IP presentation at 5pm, kill me please. Why would the teachers choose a timing like this when I end at 12pm today!!! :(

I'm so bored that I uploaded many overdued pictures in facebook, but I'm still stoning now.

I'm addicted to this song after I went K-boxing with you on Christmas Eve! :)

2009-01-20T23:58:00.002+08:00

幸福开始有预兆
缘分让我们慢慢紧靠
然后孤单被吞没了
我俩变得有话聊
有变化了...

(: I love school so much now please. Probably because of Eileen, Nezeem and Clement! :) Hmm if only time would stay, let us stay like this forever... Rewind everything again.

2009-01-17T14:41:00.004+08:00

I don't know if you still read my blog religiously a not. I just feel so weird not seeing you today, seriously. :( I'm so dead people, really. Are you just nice to me, purely because of entertainment for everyone or are you nice to me genuinely, right from the bottom of your heart?

I'm loving my last semester, enjoying and treasuring every minute of it. I've been thinking of what I could do from March-August (That's if I can get into Uni). Erm I think driving is top of my list.

Last night, a few of HR peeps met up together for a small gathering. Clement, Shermaine, Yik Hui, Maureen, Song xi, his girlfriend, Christine, Hui Jun, Hui Xin went to Chomp Chomp for dinner. And I met them there, then Shermaine and Song Xi drove us to Yik Hui's house for Mahjong session. I don't know how to play unfortunately. After that, Shermaine drove Christine, Maureen and I home. Girls who drive are damn cool please. Also, I love people who can drive!!! :)

So I've decided not to wait for my chauffeur, Clement Leong already. By the time he gets his BMW right, I might have already got Audi! Haha kidding! :P Okay, so driving and I shall go learn Guzheng again and maybe pick up a third language! But I need money so should I work a not!!! :S Or continue getting my allowance from poor daddy. :( I feel so bad la! I'm going to 20, yet I continue to stretch my hands out whenever he is back home. :S Zzz maybe I'd look for a part time job or what. I'm so excited at the thought of Jasmine, Jasper and Alan coming back! :)

I want to work with Clement and Jasper! (Knowing Jasmine Lin probably wouldn't work! -.-) She is a lazy piggy! Lol! And I can't wait to go on cruise!!! Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. <3 bye people!

2009-01-15T21:49:00.004+08:00

I ended up typing in the survey answers myself because I forgot to bring them to school today. :( Double work! :( Haha nvm we shouldn't be so 'calculative' right, Eileen?

I really really can't wait for this semester to be over, but at the same time, I know I will miss NP and the people. :( Can I have the best of both worlds?

P.S. Man United second now after beating Wigan!

My favourite, Clement in school
We're waiting for Jasmine and Jasper to come back to complete the picture! :)

2009-01-14T00:25:00.006+08:00

내 머리가 나빠서 - SS501

(: This is good!

SS501 (Because I'm Stupid) Boys Over Flowers ending OST

Because I am too stupid
I have no one besides you
You, who is looking at someone else
Dont you know how I felt?

There isnt me in your days
And not even having any remembrance
Me, who looking at you whom I am yearning for
Always shed tears

It is my happiness even to be looking at your back
You still dont know how I felt
In the end, you go past me

In the days where I miss you very much
In the days where I suffered the pains
I love you whirls near my mouth
Crying for you alone yet again
Missing for you alone yet again
Baby! I love you! Im waiting for you!

There isnt me in your days
And not even having any memories
I am looking at you whom I am yearning for
Making the memories on my own

Love is like a beautiful wound to me
Even when I see your beautiful smile
I am unable to laugh with you

Bye bye never say good bye
Though I am unable to hold you like this
I need you, I am unable to say anything, I want you, I wish for and wish for it again

In the days where I think of you a lot
In the days where it is very cold and sad
I love you whirls near my mouth
Crying for you alone yet again
Missing for you alone yet again
Baby! I love you! I'm waiting for you!

By SS501 okay, my favourite Kim Hyun Joong. :) :) :)

This is also Boys Over Flowers (Hana Yori Dango) ending OST!

Lee Min Ho, Kim Hyun Joong, Koo Hye Sun, Kim Joon, Kim Bum

Cast:
Koo Hye Sun as Makino Tsukushi
F4:
Lee Min Ho as Domyoji Tsukasa
Kim Hyun Joong as Hanazawa Rui
Kim Bum as Nishikado Sojiro
Kim Joon as Mimasaka Akira

This is the Korean version. Taiwanese and Japanese's versions were a great success! So let's see how good can the Korean version get. So far, their ratings are good! :)

Lee Min Ho is damn hot please. :S Somehow, I don't find Kim Hyun Joong as good looking in the show. I think it's because he is acting as Hanazawa Rui. Personally, I love Domyoji Tsukasa's character the best. :D

Kim Bum, Kim Joon, Lee Min Ho, Koo Hye Sun, Kim Hyun Joong

Lee Min Ho is just so cute right. Catch the show people, next up tmr, episode 4! :D

P.S. Cristiano Ronaldo, world player! :) So what's up next? I've lost count of his trophies this season! :P

Going down for surveys with Clement, Eileen and Nezeem again! :) Quite sians initially but it's with them, so still slightly better. :) Last semester already, so people give your best shot alrights!

LOVES. ♡♡♡

2009-01-12T21:38:00.003+08:00

Beginning of second week in school, but I'm already tired. I've been sleeping real early these few days. And I'm going to continue this healthy lifestyle.

There're so many things that I'm so tired of. And there're even more things that I'm missing right now. But, I'm a happy girl for now alrights. :)

P.S. Man United won Chelsea 3-0!!!! And they'd probably go up the table to 2nd place on Wednesday and top the table on Saturday. (BYEBYE LOUSY LIVERPOOL) :p say all you want people, there's only one champion alrights. :) Cheers!

P.S.S. Count down to Jasmine and Jasper coming back. Erm roughly 7 weeks to go? :) Seems rather long right, but it's only 49 days away!!! :P :P :P HEHE.

2009-01-03T03:47:00.002+08:00

Saranghae ❤

P.S. I'm loving Korean's cultures and stuffs more and more. :) Not to mention that their celebrities are damn hot.

2009-01-03T01:59:00.005+08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE :)

The 4 Sisters. (Taken at Germaine's house on Boxing Day!)

P.S. I had been doing projects in school for the last few days. :( I'm awfully sorry if I've neglected anyone. :) Hehe.

My all time favourite boy; Kim Hyun Joong

Son Dambi;
Warning! This is what makes you turn lesbian. :D
Son Dambi with her latest number 1 song!

xoxo (: FIGHTING! ♡

2008-12-30T00:11:00.009+08:00

Happy Birthday - Piano

HAPPY 22nd BIRTHDAY BF! :)

This is the first time I'm posting up our pics. (Even though I look damn weird inside all but wells, for you okay!) I'm really happy to have you by my side to accompany me through all my happiness and sorrows. I'm whom I'm today, because of you. I want you to walk this long journey with me always, my smartest BF.

生日快乐哦! 谢谢你一直那么珍惜疼惜我。虽然我是野蛮女友，你还是那么纵容我的一切，一直一直地在肯定我。也因为有你，我看到了前所未有的幸福。而你的明天也会一直有我。。。

每天都要过的精彩哦!

P.S. I didn't force him to take any of the pictures okay. Even though he looks kinda being forced. -.- Annoyed.

2008-12-26T01:24:00.014+08:00

I'm using Dad's desktop to blog now because my bro is using my laptop to DOTA. :S This is so weird, I'm so not used to using Desktop anymore.

Anyway, celebrated Christmas with my family this year! :) Dinner and present exchanging at my Uncle's place. Hahah and I've tons of pics...... of myself. Haha! :P

Ahhhhhhhhhh :( I'm damn zilian please.

Steamboat at Germaine's house later. :) Get to see the 3 of girls (Germaine, JasmineT & Khim Cheng) soon!!! ♥ ♥ ♥

2008-12-25T02:45:00.002+08:00

圣诞节快乐哦! :)

我们在一起的每一秒
总让我想
把你的一举一动
存放在心里
永远珍藏不动

而和你在一起的每一刻
都将变成
我们之间
永恒的瞬间

P.S. 我想，

我已经爱上纪存希。。。

2008-12-23T01:02:00.001+08:00

最近的我，好困好困。也许是因为这样，也可能是因为好久好久没有没有动文笔了，今天终于又决定开始了。。。但是不知道还能像从前吗? 可以把想表达的事情，事物，还有隐藏在心里的一些话说给大家听听。

我常在想，这段時间接触到的人事物，也许会改变我的一生。我愿意说，但是你愿意听吗? 我想把关于自己的一切都让你知道，那你呢? 你会愿意把你的一切一切都告诉我吗?

看了看今年在乌节路的圣诞装饰品，觉得挺精致漂亮的，不过还不是我个人最喜欢的。反而，去年的白色圣诞是我的最爱。它冷傲了一些，伤感了一些，沉默了一些，晚了一些的感觉，还真是符合我去年的情形。美的事物总是短暂的，但是它也是最牵动人心的。所以大家一定要好好爱护身边最珍惜的人。

除了那些正在打工的朋友，大家一定都在放假吧! 圣诞节是个好温馨的节日哦! 尤其是和你爱的人或爱你的人一起度过，好幸福啊! 亲爱的朋友们，一定要快乐哦。。。

圣诞节快乐! :)

"告诉你湿透了的城市

其实真正湿透了的是我的心

但是

你总是听不懂我的爱的语言

只会要我

记得打伞”

-希望大家的爱情，不是这样的。趁这个圣诞节，把想告诉对方的话，说给他听吧! 告诉他，你想真正要的是什么。

P.S. 一直以来，我最想要的圣诞节礼物是。。。

幸福 :)

2008-12-19T22:47:00.010+08:00

From Singapore's Flyer; taken 1234567 years ago. Lol.

Malacca Christ Church; Half of the family. :( Without 2 more families, 2 more uncles & grandpa

Malacca; (Even Joseph says I'm fat now.) :(

I've been doing nothing this whole holiday. Just shopping NON-STOP, going back to dentist (3 TIMES ALREADY IN DEC), eating. I've to shake off some weight because I'm getting fatter like !@#$&^$#@!. :S According to Joseph, I'm twice my Sec 4 size now. :(

P.S. I really want to catch Twilight. Someone, please ask me along if you're watching. I love cute vampires! :D

2008-12-14T01:29:00.004+08:00

(: My favourite version. I'll marry whoever who can play this! (Haha, kidding.) I'd be back to Malacca in a few hours time. :( Byeee everyone.

P.S. My braces is officially off, totally! :P
P.S.S. I really miss Jasmine L. :(

2008-12-12T01:34:00.012+08:00

I'm so hooked on to 'We Got Married' because of them. How can anyone not love them?

Kim Hyun Joong & Hwangbo ♥

Not to mention that both of them are hot. :S And I realised smt. If you were to hang out with someone too much, there's a high possibility that you'd look like that person. (For example: Look alike or couple look) The more you guys hang out with each other, the more both of you look alike. It is proven okay. If don't believe, can ask Nezeem, Eileen or Clement. I'm sure they agree right. Hehe. :P

P.S. They really look like real life couple even though they're only a make believe pair. :S I hope they end up together and I'm pretty sure many do want them to be together... (They are Jasper's favourite couple too!) I must be too depressed over their departure of the show that I keep re-watching their episodes all over again.

I want my love to be perfect, can you give me my perfect love? I'm still searching...

2008-12-08T01:55:00.002+08:00

(: I'm happy for this Christmas.

P.S. The heart-to-heart talk makes me so much better! It cleared lots of things and I finally got to know the half missing puzzle! (: (Not mentioning any names here, so don't ask me who is the person.) I'm pretty sure that person reads my blog. :) No tags on this please.

2008-12-03T00:23:00.004+08:00

《星光游乐园》

就像星星落在地面七彩闪烁世界
游乐园颜色像卡片
旋转木马带我们在飞我的手让你牵
爱情原来是最香浓咖啡杯
摩天轮里面独处的时间
我心情游客谁都了解
背包的左边票根的背面
我趁你不注意偷偷写下心愿
　
期待今夜天空星星不熄灭
在心里约定陪你到永远
抬头看一遍星星眨眼
现在你就在我身边
　
我祈祷就让地球停在这瞬间
不聊天静静散步也很美
抬头看一遍你的侧脸
想到微笑挂你唇边
　
就像城堡前的花园
爱这幸福感觉
能不能这样都不变
拍张我们合照的相片
烟火停在天边
你的好也停在我的心里面

爆米花香味带着一种甜
喜欢你开心大笑的脸
背包的左边票根的背面
我趁你不注意偷偷写下心愿

我祈祷就让地球停在这瞬间
不聊天静静散步也很美
抬头看一遍你的侧脸
想到微笑挂你唇边

我期待今夜天空星星不熄灭
在心里约定陪你到永远
抬头看一遍星星眨眼
现在你就在我身边

(: Specially for someone. Hehe. (No prizes for guessing!)

2008-11-30T18:11:00.008+08:00

I'm here to update again. Once again, a tiring week! I had to reach school by 9am everyday from Monday-Saturday except Thursday 8am. I'm glad that all these are finally over! Pictures again! I've been taking so many pictures this semester because it's probably our last semester and only pictures hold memories forever.

The mean girls; Nezeem, Zhi Yan, Eileen

Clement & I :)

Us; exactly half year ago! :)
Look at how much we've changed. (Clement for your sake, I post my unglam picture!)

Now; :)

Me, Eileen

P.S. I really hope I can take down braces tmr. Hopefully my dentist will stop giving me false hope.
P.S.S. I wonder, does my woman miss me over in china! :(

I'm so sick of guys leaving their gfs, giving all kinds of excuses like 'I want to concentrate on my study.', 'It's not that I don't love you, but I want a time-out.', 'You know, I still love you but I feel that there's this distance btw us.' ... Endless excuses please. Then the next moment, they get a new gf. Seriously, it's so unfair to the girl. At least let her know that you no longer love her, so let her go. Stop giving her all kinds of reasons to hold on. @!#$%^~!@#$#% I get very pissed and mad when I see guys doing that to my gfs. Seriously, what are they even thinking about!!! Why even let her hang in the middle of nowhere! :( I'm so sorry that I've to post this up. Because my good friend, A is a great girl and she doesn't deserve this kind of lousy treatment from you, loser idiot! (And yes, I'm hoping you do read this.) BYE!

2008-11-23T00:28:00.031+08:00

A short update on my life. :)

Last Sunday (16/11/08)
Went out with Eric for lunch and drop by Sheryl's zouk flea stall. It had been quite some time since we last met each other, I think the last time we met was on Sophina's birthday party at Demsey's. Eric is no longer small boy!

Tuesday (18/11/08)
Went to the dentist and good news! I'd be taking down braces on 1st Dec!!! :p

Wednesday (19/11/08)
HRA Project Outing at Marina. 4 of us (Me, Clement, Eileen and Mizie) went down on behalf of our HRA group. After that, I spent some quality time with Clement and Eileen at Cityhall. :) Some pictures to share.

Some machine that allows us to capture our pictures on NTUC link card. (Note: We're working with NTUC Healthcare for this HRA project.)

Clement

Mizie

Eileen

Me

Group Pic (Unsuccessful attempt)

Group Pic (Successful attempt)

Clement and me
Eileen and me :)

Friday (21/11/08)
Relationship Management in Workplace (RMW) Mini Test

Saturday (22/11/08)
Sentosa Outing with Clement and Eileen. We went cycling and Sentosa really has lots of upwards slopes. :( And I'm seriously a lousy cyclist. :( Anyway, enjoyed myself so much. So the next Sentosa trip, Clement will be topless right? Hehe. Eileen hasn't send me the pictures, but I do have a few with me. I'll edit again if there're nicer pictures :)

On the way home :) Endless cam whoring.

In the lift when my hair is already damn messy (Decided to post this up, so ppl will stop thinking that my pics are photoshopped because I do have ugly side too)

I felt a bit nostalgic, or should I say touched when you told me you still read my blog. You know, I'll still be here whenever you need me and I want you to be happiest. :)

2008-11-16T02:25:00.008+08:00

I really have to blog this out. I've been addicted to them/song for the whole past week! They are the Wondergirls! :) In case, you guys have no idea who they're, you can click here.

Nobody
You know I still love you baby,
And it will never change

I want nobody, nobody but you
I want nobody, nobody but you
I want no one else but you
Can't have anyone but you
I want nobody nobody nobody nobody

Why are you trying to push me away?
You know that I hate it,
You ignore what I'm saying
Why are you trying to send me to other?
You push me away like a little each day, why?

Saying that this is for my own good
Saying that you are just not worth it
Please, stop it right now coz'
you know me enough that I will come back to you, no matter what

I want nobody, nobody but you
I want nobody, nobody but you
I want no one else but you
Can't have anyone but you
I want nobody nobody nobody nobody

All the pushing won't change my feelings
I am happy to have you,
more than willing to please you
I'm begging you please
Don't walk away from me
Coz' I can't be happy away
from your side

Saying that this is all for my own good
Saying that you are just not worth it
Please, stop it right now coz'
you know me enough that I will come back to you, no matter what

I want nobody, nobody but you
I want nobody, nobody but you
I want no one else but you
Can't have anyone but you
I want nobody nobody nobody nobody

Rap:
Back to the days when we were
so young and wild and free
Everything we had back then
was like a dream
If only I could turn back time
Why do you keep on pushing me away?
why do you push me away?

I want nobody, nobody,
nobody, nobody but you

Since it's translated from Korean to English, the lyrics is still kinda weird, but well it's a catchy song right! :)

And yes, I want nobody, nobody, but Kim Hyun Joong. :)

Happy weekend & good night! :D

2008-11-09T00:49:00.017+08:00

Pictures update.

The girls (:

Mizie and I

Random:

Jian Zhou (:

Sheng Xuan! :D

Zhi Zhong; trying to hide from the camera :S

I miss...

Jasper S alot.... :(

2008-11-07T10:02:00.002+08:00

I think I've lost the ability to blog... Life is not exactly the best right now but well, I don't and won't hope for more. Hmm I called Jasmine and Jasper last night. It makes me realised that time and distance do really drift people apart. We're into our final semester in NP, yet they're not here with me. And by the time they come back from China, it would probably be Graduation Day already.

Again, I've so much to update but I don't know where I should start from. I miss you so much. I've no idea why you're avoiding me but I still want to let you know, you're still my buddy and I'll still be right here whenever you need me even though you may not need me anymore...

2008-10-17T15:03:00.005+08:00

First week of school is nearly gone! :) Shall update more during weekends since I'm still having the last lecture of the week now!

Me! :)

My boyfriend, Kim Hyun Joong :)

2008-10-13T01:21:00.003+08:00

HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY TO MY DEAREST WOMAN, JASMINE LIN. :)
Stay pretty and happy over at Guilin. I'm sorry for not being there with you. I can only give you a phonecall to wish you. But still, no matter what, I'm just a phonecall away. I gonna get a prepaid card soon! So I can call you anytime I want to. Using handphone is just way too expensive! Lol.

I shall call Jasper if I've the time too. Or else someone complains ~!@#$%^&* again!

Jasmine is homesick in GuiLin but I'm Jasminesick in Singapore. :( I don't want to go school tmr.

P.S. Taking off braces before Christmas! :D

2008-10-10T15:29:00.004+08:00

I miss....

1) Jasmine L

2) Jasper S

3) Clement L

:( School's starting and I don't know what to expect.

2008-10-02T13:03:00.002+08:00

是你在那个雨季走进我心里
融化了我所有伪装的坚定

2008-10-01T01:13:00.009+08:00

I think I look better with shoulder length hair! :( Okay and I shall go straighten my hair once more. (Hopefully, I won't look like some china woman again!)

For thoses who're curious about what Jasmine gave me at the airport! It's a 1000 pieces hello kitty jigsaw puzzle. And she actually framed it up as well. :)

Sorry for lousy quality. I'm too lazy to take again and bluetooth to laptop!

And what I gave her; 19 roses but fake ones lah. I think a few ppl thought that I was going to propose to her at the airport. LOL. :P Anyway, I did for one whole night so I really hope she'll like it.

; I still love you with the skip of a heartbeat every time I see your face.

2008-09-25T22:32:00.007+08:00

Went to send Jas S and Jas L off to China on the 24th September. A date that I'll firmly remember forever. Maybe you guys don't understand but sending off 2 of your best friends/buddies to a foreign country for at least half a year sucks. You wouldn't want to be in my shoes. Anyways, let the pictures talk. I don't feel like blogging tonight.

Group Picture all of us; Jas S, Jane T, me, Jas L & Clement L

Me, Jas L & Jane T

Again :)

Jas S

Us again :)

Jas L and me :) BFF! ❤

P.S. Tell me, 6 months is only 182.5 days.

2008-09-18T23:58:00.000+08:00

Kim Hyun Joong is love. :D

2008-09-17T11:47:00.003+08:00

More and more, I start to realize,
I can reach my tomorrow,
I can hold my head high,
And it's all because you're by my side.

When you look me in the eyes,
And tell me that you love me.
Everything's alright,
When you're right here by my side.
When I hold you in my arms
I know that it's forever
I just gotta let you know
I never wanna let you go

When you look me in the eyes.
And tell me that you love me.
Everything's alright,
When you're right here by my side.
When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
I find my paradise,
When you look me in the eyes.

(:

2008-09-11T23:39:00.002+08:00

Just want to thank Clement L. :) When I received your Japan's amulet, for that second, I really felt happiness forever. Well, it's supposed to work like this right! :D So glad you're back in Singapore.

2008-09-10T00:37:00.008+08:00

Okay I'm back... Haha! And the reason why I'm blogging is because, Desmond is POP-ing today! :) Congrats! Happy for you, a better man out! :) Don't worry about your botak hair please!

Also, Jiahao went back to US already. I'm a bit upset over it. Because of the time differences, it's harder to gossip and whine to him on msn now. :( And he'd only be coming back next May. That's like 8 months away?!

On a brighter note, I've been slacking and spending some time with my books. (Storybooks, not textbooks okay.)

Meeting Clement L for lunch later because someone claimed to say that he had gotten me a unique teacup from Japan. (Note: UNIQUE.) I shall blog about its uniqueness again. -.- (If what he claimed was true lah!)

I've no bangs anymore :( I've not decide if I should cut back or what. Aiyah, see how then. I'm in cranky mood tonight. :S

Things to be done ASAP (During holidays):
1) Meetups with
Jasmine L
Clement L (Later!)
Jasper S
The girls (Mau, PL, Jane & Nazeem)
LC and CL (If CL is not rushing her final year project)
the remaining 3 duo huas (Germaine, KC, Jas T)

2)
Resume Guzheng Lessons ASAP
Try to find time for ZhongRuan

3)
Pack my room

4)
Get a new digital camera
(I'm thinking of Sony or what, any recommendations?)

5)
New small laptop

6)
Spend more time with family

7)
Collect my cert at NAFA

8)
Collect new specs

9)
Car License

10)
Plan Dec holidays with SH. :)

Anyway, a very HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ChumLok! (If he still reads my blog!)

Goodnight everyone, Happy Wednesday! :)

Tsk, I can't seem to upload pictures to blogger tonight! :(

2008-08-26T22:26:00.003+08:00

And there's really hearts all over the world tonight;

(: Watch me shine, tmr.

2008-08-25T00:27:00.001+08:00

Hello everyone! Hope everyone has been doing good especially those final year students. I suppose everyone is already done with their exams! :D Anyway, pictures post ahead. I'm sorry that I can’t write you entries describing what I see and where I go to everyday because I am not that sort of writer; I blog whenever I feel like or when there's a need.

Went to eat some good food with SH a while ago...

Blur SH

Maureen and I

Clement

All pictures taken by Hui Jun when she was using my phone to camwhore. =/
Some of the HR guys

Mrs Tit

Hui Jun; using my phone to camwhore, endlessly!

Eileen and Mrs Tit

Maureen

; You know love is real when it changes the life you’re living.

Okay goodnight everyone, till next post then! ❤❤❤

2008-08-14T21:36:00.008+08:00

This study break seems really long but super duper truper torturous. (I CAN ASSURE YOU THAT I'M NOT KIDDING!) Unlike rich boy, Clement who will be going over to Japan soon, I'm trying to stuff everything into my small brain/eating up every single pieces of notes now. :(

Arggggggggh there're so much things/people that I miss! Endless shopping sprees, gossips, bitching ard with Mau especially (Since Eileen doesn't bitch as much!), whining to Clement L (I don't think he appreciates this and he may be secretly happy about the long break we're having now!), lots of good food (Because I'm on diet now; my thighs are getting annoyingly big! -.-)...

Last but not least, my dearest woman, Jasmine Lin. All the best for your exam woman. If you get to see this, bring me along to GuiLin pretty please. (Jasper, bring me also. I promise I'll try to cook for both of you! -.- Yeah right, I don't mind if you guys dare to eat whatever I cook.) I can't believe both of you are leaving me for half a year. :( (Okay okay, shall blog on this issue after exams)

Meanwhile, good luck to all reading my blog. Especially the final year students! :)

P.S. I love you, sweetheart dan! :P

2008-08-13T02:11:00.004+08:00

I'm pretty happy with how things are going on in my life at this moment. :) Though exams is only a few days away, I'm happy, for now. Maybe except that...

I miss my bangs laaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh ~!@#$%^&*

2008-08-07T01:59:00.005+08:00

I went to trim my bangs on Tuesday. (They were almost covering my eyes, if not all.) And I look horrendous now because Trina cut them too short. It's above my eyebrows now. :( Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh. I feel like scolding the F word 10000000000 times if that makes my bangs longer now. I shouldn't kpo and touch it in the first place, so here I'm whining and no one cares (in particular my woman and SH).

Wish me luck for T&D tmr! Nights!

Bangs, bangs
come back to me...

clement L's bday

2008-07-31T12:41:00.000+08:00

This post is delicated to my dearest, Clement L. :D

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CLEMENT L. :)

It's really nice to have you around. Someone who will listen to my whinings 24/7. You know, I love you the most. Enough said right! :) You said, drop into river together! Rmb ah. :) HAPPY BIRTHDAY once again! Thanks for your Grand Hyatt's treat. :) Some photos of us today! (I too lazy to blog all out, so if you guys want the pictures, please ask from Jasper S.)

TATA~~~:)

2008-07-31T01:09:00.004+08:00

Again, I hate people poking around and asking about my personal life. I find it hilarious that I'm expected to update people one by one? Like hello, who are you to me? Think again. If I want to let you know, I'd have done so. It's my problem ultimately.

Anyway it's confirmed, my dearest woman will be going to China for half year. :( Like seriously, wth -.- Anyway, I'll save up and go there to visit her! :( I can't imagine not seeing her for half a year. You know, nearly half a semester has gone by but I still feel lost without her in school. Sometimes, I wonder... ...

P.S. If you've anything, you better say it right now coz you don't have another day.

2008-07-25T00:48:00.005+08:00

The world just seems too fragile a place for it. And of every other kind, life remains full. Perhaps it’s just we who are too fragile. But it may not be a bad thing either. Anyway it's already Saturday! Weekend is here, baby!

Anyway, I got tagged by Shirley, so I'm going to do this right now! (Okay, I'm damn bored now!)

#1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
Kill him and cut him into pieces! Haha

#2. If you can have a dream come true, what would it be?
Happiness forever.

#3. If you could be at one place right now, where would it be?
Old Trafford, theatre of dreams.

#4. Are you confused as to what lies ahead of you?
Yes, but again, this is what makes the future exciting. :)

#5. What's your ideal lover like?
Ideal lover is always different from reality. So yah. Next.

#6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
Loving someone. Definitely, being loved by someone sucks when you don't return his/her feelings.

#7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?
.... I guess I don't have to, for now. Hehe.

#8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
Pray everyday that they will break up. Lol kidding.

#9. Is there anything that has made you unhappy these days?
Not really...

#10. What do you want most in life?
... I want everything, can?!

#11. Is being tagged fun?
No, it's actually quite stupid. I've no idea why I'm doing these in the first place. Probably it's Friday night. :P

#12. How do you see yourself in ten years time?
Probably a housewife? Or going to...

#13. Who is the current most important person to you?
My mum, no doubt about it.

#14. What type of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
My pretty sister whom I've not seen for ages.

#15. Would you rather be single & rich or married but poor?
Single and rich.

#16. If you could have any animal for a pet, what would it be?
Puppy.

#17. What are one of those things which you would prefer not to do?
Roller Coaster

#18. What kind of person do you think you are?
I'm whinnyyyyyyyyyyy.

#19. What do you define as a bad day?
Bad mood, bad hair, bad stuffs.

#20. If you have to choose between love and friendship, what would it be?
Friendship, again no doubt about it. It's hard to have the best of both worlds.

I shall not tag anyone, do it if you want! :)

Take the secret out of your eyes and read me your history while we let this song play like an embrace that never ends; we’ll taste the years that went by and remember the scent of longing like it was only yesterday, yesterday when I first heard you speak and turned my head. I want you here for life...

2008-07-22T01:19:00.003+08:00

I've so many things to blog and I don't know where I can start! Hehe :P

Jasper and I, like AGAIN

Submitted 2 reports recently, TD on last Friday and IP on Monday. Finally, almost everything is cleared but that only brings us nearer to exam. :( Is this what we are living for, eventually?

When the topic of you was broached by our friends, I thought the avoidance of the topic was necessary. Not because I hate you nor dislike you, I just don't feel like talking about you. I hate how people 'link' us up and when they ask about me, they'd ask about you too. I've my own life too and I hate that connection.

Anyway, on a much much much brighter note, 最近的我是快乐的，因为身边出现了让我打从心底就想对他们好的人。

Everything is light,
you and me and
this tiny vehicle that’s going to take us somewhere -
perhaps somewhere, a place
we don’t have to think about
what others have to say
about time and love and boys
and us; about mistakes being made
and a fondness misunderstood
but I am this close to you,
this close to believing we have something
to begin fighting for...

Nights ppl, I'm tired. xoxo.

2008-07-18T00:19:00.005+08:00

Thanks to all who made my 19th birthday a memorable one. Will blog more about it later since I'm still rushing my TD project! :) Hehe :P Byeeee.

Edited 2.01am
Okay, I just completed TD project! Anyway, back to my 19th birthday. It was splendid! :) Special thanks to Germaine, KC, Jas T, Jas L, Jasper S, Clement L, Andy T, Kelvin T, Mau, Jane, Nezeem, Daniel T, Nicole, Shirley, Dexter, Jian Zhou, Jian Kai, Amanda, Julian, Sheng Xuan, Ade, Darcy, Sop, Kling, Dicky for coming down for my BBQ. :) Just some pictures to update! :) There are too many so I'm only uploading a few.

And I really want to thank Jasper S and Clement L for making me the sketch book. I know it takes a great deal of time and effort, so rest assured that I'll really take good care of it!

Thanks to people who wished me too, be it through calls/smses/friendster/facebook, it's greatly appreciated!

Okay that's all for now.

Anyway, I've smt to say to a particular someone but right now, I don't feel like blogging about it. Wait for your birthday ba, it's coming right. :) Nights hooooooooooney. xoxo.

2008-07-12T00:54:00.053+08:00

Finally I've the time to blog. Long post ahead!

Let's start with Thursday 10/7/08
We went to several hotels to get our interviews! And we did 3! Pan Pacific Hotel, Hotel 81 and Parkview Hotel. And we took lots of pictures, mainly taken at Pan Pacific Hotel! :) So here they are.

Pan Pacific. (:

Spiral Stairway

Indoor lifts

Indoor cafe

View from the outdoor lifts! (:

Eileen and I @ Swensens

Eileen's backview

Clement's backview

Our reflection

Eileen and I, again again again

Clement, falling asleep

Clement and I (:

Cute Milo :)

Clement and I

Eileen clinching a million deal from Pan Pacific, for us! :)

Emo-ing

Dearest Clement!

Eileen :)
Clement zilian-ing in toilet

me and eileen again

Credits: Clement :)

Friday 11/7/08, our presentation day
Empty corridors

Saturday 12/7/08, Jasmine's bazaar! :)
Pity that I didn't take a picture with her.
Clement, looking at Sakae's menu

Jasper and I :) Cam-whoring.

Mei mei (:

Random

2008-07-09T01:58:00.015+08:00

To: Dearest Jasmine L
I know things ain't fine over at your side but trust me, no matter what I'm going to make them fine. You know, I wished I was there to prevent all the bad things from happening and I also wished that i was by your side everytime you needed me. I just want to let you know whenever you need a comfort zone to fall or a place to hide, come to me because I will always be here for you. I'll get you through your hard/sad/confused times because I love you, for whom you are. So woman, don't change a single bit. I still feel lost without you in school and no one can/could replace you in my heart. I guess it's the sort of chemistry we share, knowing what each other want, how each other feel, without even opening mouth. Haha anyway, don't worry so much because I'll hold on your hand and tell you everything's gonna be okay. :) BFF!
❤,
Zhiyan

Okay just some photos to share.
My group playing card games during break. Haha!

I'll have more HR pictures to upload once Clement send me the HR Training Day pictures. :D

Okay, Clement and Eileen's most hilarious expression for you :)

CO ppl :D
Tengyeow, me, Zhizhong, Shengxuan, Jianzhou, Bei bei, Yang

Went to tighten my braces on Tuesday morning. It hurts alot seriously. And obviously I don't feel like elaborating more on this topic. :(
Anyway, IP presentation is on Friday. I just want to get things done and get over with it then Jasmine L's bazaar on Saturday and finally my bday celebration on Sunday. For thoses whom I've smsed, confirm ASAP okay.

I miss:

BYE!

2008-07-04T00:53:00.004+08:00

I just have to say, even though I know I've already said that over 10000000000000000000000000000000 times. I miss my woman. :( I really do. Sometimes I do wonder, why did I even choose HR over Entrepreneur? I mean I'm not regretting now but I just want her to be by my side. Maybe it's because of the IEMP quiz that's driving me nuts. Maybe it's because I'm PMSing now. I do not know what I'm blogging anymore. I just miss her.

Nights people.

P.S. Certain memories/people stay with you for life, no matter you want/dun want. Sometimes, you do not have a choice. It's all within the heart. (In this case, I'm not referring to Jasmine L.)

2008-07-02T23:42:00.010+08:00

I know I haven been blogging for the longest time but don't worry people! I'm still alive! Haha :P I've lots and tons of pictures to be up, but again one thing at a time! :D

Pictures on our HR workshop day (Will upload more soon!)
Clement and Maureen

Nazeem and I

Clement and I

So I cut my hair!
Jasper, Clement!

My new hair

(: Nights people.

2008-06-19T00:08:00.004+08:00

Happy 19th Birthday Mr. J Seah. May all your dreams come true & find your dream gal soon! :D

I can't explain or voice out how much I appreciate you. I just want to let you know that you are the best. I thank you for everything you've ever done for me. (E.g. listening to all my rantings on my pms days, lending me a listening ear when things don't work out well, walking me through my darkest, gloomiest days, wait for me to finish my manicure) So dearest, just remember when you're feeling blues, I'd be standing next to you to whisper a song of hope and pat your back to put your life back onto track! I'll always have your back. ❤ Happy Birthday once again, Jasper!

2008-06-13T02:23:00.004+08:00

Went to the clinic on Tuesday to tighten my braces. :( It already Friday 2.25am and still hurts right now. Whhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhy. But good news is, my dentist has assured me that I could take them down, most probably in a year's time!

And it really startles me how time flies. I'm only left with one more week before school reopens. Even though I've been complaining that I've nth to do everyday, it doesn't mean that I like going back school. And I know I still owe a lot of ppl their dates but please give me some time to clear them okay.

P.S. I feel nostalgic after talking to you. Is it just me or maybe, is it us?
P.S.S. I miss my woman who is in Japan happily now!

2008-06-03T01:30:00.004+08:00

Funny how sometimes you have so many things on your mind but just can't seem to find the words to say. It's not just one single thing/person I'm thinking about. I'm thinking a million things at the same time at lightning speed. Just that some thoughts catch my attention as I ponder around it for a while.

Anyway, it's already Tuesday 1.33am! I'm done with my e-learning and common test! Thus, it's holidays till 22md June! That's a good whole 19 days!

My love for Kaká came back after reading several reports about him! And I think if Ronaldo still insists / wants to leave United, then carry on. We don't want players who can't keep to their promises and play hard to get. As much as I love him, it's time to stop all these constant nonsense. Show some loyalty to the club and assure the fans, if not just leave United and hug Madrid.

P.S. I'm still looking for things to do / things to entertain me for my-not-so-long holiday.

2008-05-27T22:34:00.002+08:00

Things I've to do ASAP:

1) Study for Common Test
2) Finish up all my e-learning tutorials
3) Save moneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey
4) Go to the dentist and change my braces

❤

玉山白雪飘零
燃烧少年的心
使真情溶化成音符
倾诉遥远的祝福

Will update soon yar. Till then, byebye wheeeeeeeeeeee!

2008-05-24T13:51:00.006+08:00

Anyway, for a few reasons, I'm reopening my blog again. :D So KC, you better tag orights. :)

So Man United completed Doubles :D Champions of England and Europe! Some pictures to share.

Man United lifting up the trophy!

Group picture!

My sweetheart, ronaldo trying to bite his medal

Lessons learnt from the Finals:
1. You can play mind games with Drogba if you're Vidic, not if you're Rafa Benitez.

2. Hargreaves should be Man United’s penalty taker. His penalty was brilliant, compared to Ronaldo's.

3. You can’t win the game on your own, Micheal Ballack.

4. Centre Defenders (For e.g. John Terry) should not be allowed to take penalties under any circumstance.

5. Man United and Chelsea can’t play a high tempo game against each other, but they can fill it with enough talking points to last the summer.

6. Man United were the better team over the season, so deserved it. However they fared on the night.

Manchester United who are Champions of Europe, and have probably been the best club side in Europe this season - if not always in Europe. :)

HAPPY WEEKEND LOVELIES! I'll update soon yar!

P.S. If you want to play the game, learn the rules well first sweetheart!

2008-05-13T22:23:00.009+08:00

I'm so dead from school. I'm not physically but mentally tired. Anyway, today was our HR Bonding Day! I had lecture from 9-11, then 11-12 was our break, finally my last lecture was at 12-2. And I had to stone in the library for 2 hours from 2-4 because bonding event only starts at 4pm. The whole event ended at 7pm ~!@#$%^&*. Maureen and I took bus to Hougang Mall and did some catching ups with one another. It has been quite some time since I last talked (gossiped) with her. And I was updated with alot of the latest scandalous and stuffs. Finally home sweet home at 930pm. :( I've no life at all, kill me.

Some pictures!

'Myspace' @ Blk 72 (Business Blk)

Clement too focused with his laptop (I wonder what's he doing! -.-)

Eileen too exhausted, falling asleep on the sofa

Me and Clement

My group for HR Bonding. (All of us are from different classes, except Clement and I)

Okay shall update again soon! Till then, byebye everyone! ❤ ❤ ❤

2008-05-11T18:30:00.002+08:00

EPL title decider today! :D I think I don't have to say anymore! Man United for the doubles! Update later yar!

2008-05-08T03:10:00.012+08:00

Hello :) Sorry for the unfrequent updates. It is not that I do not want to update but somehow, I just can't find my momentum! It's already 318am and here I'm blogging because so many people had been urging me to update. And and and I've no school on every Thursday this semester! I'm still enjoying school as much as I ought to. It scares me that I'm already in my final year in NP. :( I don't know what the future will hold for me, but for now, at least for now, I'll enjoy and treasure every single moment I've in school. :) On a brighter brighter note, my Man Utd requires 2 more wins to complete a double- Primer League and Champions League. But again, the ball is round and anything can and could happen on pitch. Nevertheless, I've faith in them and Doubles!! :D

Anyway, Germ, Jas T, KC and I met up to celebrate Germaine's 19th birthday! :D No photos uploaded but I can take from Jas T and you guys can take a look at Germaine's unglam pictures soon. :P

Once again, HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY TO GERMAINE LOW YU SHI. 12 years of friendship and still going on. All the best and may all your wishes come true.

Some of our old photos!

US in June 2005

US in August 2006 (KC's concert at Victoria Hall)

US in August 2007

US in Jan 2008 (My public performance at SCH)

(: See how much we've changed! And for KC's sake, I think I might be opening this blog to the public. My darling refuses to type in the username and password because she thinks that it's super inconvenient. And why should I even lock up this blog since I've no reasons to anymore?

P.S. Should I have long hair or should I cut my hair?
P.S.S. Don't remind me of my past especially year 2006/07. I think it's a pity that I wasted my 2 years away. LOL.
P.S.S.S. Please stop wasting our time, I'm not interested in scandalous affairs, y'know.

Nights ppl :D I hope to blog more frequently yar.

2008-05-07T00:36:00.003+08:00

I still miss JASMINE LIN JIE LIN badly. And I hate school to the max now, dreading to wake up every single morning, knowing that I've to spend my day without her again. ):

2008-04-29T00:58:00.006+08:00

((: short update to let everyone know that I'm still alive. I haven't been blogging simply because I feel I've nothing special that I ought to share with you guys. I still miss my woman and I'm still very much stuck in that transition, trying to adapt without her. ): Well on a brighter note, I feel LOVED!

(:(:(:(:(:

And this is, in case you missed me! :D

you know, you love me all along sweetheart! :X hehe!

The more I know of you, is the more I know I love you
And more that I'm sure, I want you forever and ever more
And the more that you love me, the more that I know that I'm never gonna let you go

And I promise you, I'll never let you go.

2008-04-08T22:30:00.001+08:00

I'm no longer as xxxxxxxxxx because I've found you. :D

2008-04-05T00:23:00.003+08:00

TGIF. Photos will be up next post! :)

Have you ever looked so deep into someone's eyes and know that those are the eyes you'd want to be looking into for the rest of your life? I have.
Have you ever held someone's hands and know that there will never be another hand that would fit into yours the way those do? I have.
Have you ever loved so much and lost it, only to never be able to love so completely again, knowing you're forever broken without him/her? I have.
Have you ever been so submerged in loving someone that you never want to live out of its unrealism? I have.
Have you ever felt like you loved someone so much, you lived for him/her? I have.
Have you ever loved and mended a broken love on your own, knowing that the repair would never be fully done? I have and am.

Love's just not here in my life now and what I'm afraid of is that I'll never be able to feel this way ever again. Yes, when I say I will never be able to feel this way every again, it means I don't know how to love again and forget my superfluous past. But you know, I'm afraid doesn't mean that I've given up on hope. I will not. It's just that I'm just going through this particular rough patch in my life. I promise all will be fine soon.

So what if I've changed so much? So what if I'm a scandalous bitch right now. Even if I'm a bitch, I'm a happy one. I've learnt so much from this whole lousy episode. When someone's words contradict with his actions, always trust the actions. Words are there to buy time and only fools like me will believe. However, it's all in the past. I've learnt it through the hard way and I'll never allow myself to fall again. If you're looking for committed or a 24/7 gf, don't come to me. `Cause I will only let you down and I repeat again, I hate letting ppl down.

I've so many problems right now. And most probably, the worst one is Jas L leaving me. Okay, in a way it's not 'leaving'. Aiya, I can't be bothered to think and type now. I will update in my next post really soon.

NIGHTS. ❤

2008-03-21T22:20:00.017+08:00

I've been flipping through my albums for the past few days and I'm amazed by how much I've changed! I shall let the pictures do most of the talkings tonight! :)

This is how I look like 2 years ago!

A year ago!

Now!

It totally startled me because I'd never thought that people could change so much. (None of the pictures above are photoshopped!)

I'm a real sucker for hello kittiesssssssss. :)

7 things you'll like to say to 7 different people, but will never.
I was tagged by Charmaine and she is waiting for the longest time already.

1) Stop wasting my time. I hope you can stay far far away from me. I hate the uncertainty that lingers around the air when I'm with you.

2) You know what, I hate you. I really do. I must be mad in the past for doing so many stupid things for you. I think I was even madder when I thought everything was fine between us. Nothing can be the same anymore.

3) You're the sweetest person in the whole world. :D And I'd like you to stay with me for the rest of my life.

4) I treasure you the most, as a sister, as a best friend. And it amazes me how far I think I can go for you. You are the last person I want to lose on Earth. :)

5) After going through ups and downs with you, I respect and look up to you even more. You're truly a man of your words.

6) I think I've never told you how much I like you. And when I'm with you, the whole world stops and glows beautifully. You never fail to stand out in the crowd and I can see no one but only you.

7) Do you know it's a torture to be with you at times? I hate how I have to give in again and again to you. It's just too draining and tiring.

Orights, I want Shirley, Jasper, Eileen and Jasmine Tan to do this too.

Nights sweeties. ❤ Happy Easter to all! :)

2008-03-16T16:06:00.002+08:00

When everything falls and things don't go right, I'm not afraid. Because I know you'll always be there for me. I'm sorry that I can't give you much. But still, thanks for being my comfort zone whenever I feel blues. (:

2008-03-11T00:52:00.011+08:00

Went to Hooters at Clark Quay for a drink last Saturday night with some people! I think the atmosphere is better at CHIJMES! Geraldine called and asked all of us to join her and her friends at MOS but we didn't in the end because the Liverpool's match ended at 1am! I only took a few pictures to share!

No other pictures with others as everyone was so busy with Liverpool match especially Alvin! :S Tsktsk.

Anyway, I really really really really want to marry MIKE HE JUN XIANG! :)

(: I think he is super duper truper hot please! God is so unfair right! :P Aiyah but don't care. He makes my knees go weak hoooooooooow!

BYEBYE EVERYONE! :)

2008-03-05T23:30:00.009+08:00

I don't know what exactly you want from me. You started all these and now, you're saying one thing and doing another thing. You keep telling me that I mean everything to you and you even asked my good friend to convince me about us.
For a moment, I really tot we could work things out despite our huge differences in family backgrounds. I really believed whatever things you've said or told me before. And most importantly, I really did consider putting in my all and heart to love you and forget about the past. I really wanted to try but you let me down again and again. Actions speak louder than words. All I'm asking for is to prove and show it to me instead of talking and telling me.
You do not know and understand what I want. You tot you could give me everything I wanted but what you could give, is not what I wanted. Instead of working things out, you love driving around in your mum's ferrari to the driving range, country clubs to play golf every single day and go clubbing, partying and smoke cigars with your billionaire boys every single night. This is definitely not the kind of lifestyle I'd want. I don't want to be some bimbo girl who plays golf with you every single day and a party animal at night. I know loving someone is to accept everything about him including his flaws. But I can't take all these. This is way too much and I can't even imagine the future with you.
For now, I need a break and for the time being, it's better to stop coming to me and stuffs. It's not as if you'll see these because you are obviously clubbing somewhere in town now but at least people who know us, please stop asking. It's tiring enough to deal with one person. And I thank God for not starting anything with you or I'd probably be in deep shit now.

I hate attachment to the max. Office people don't dare to talk to the both of us, simply because Jasmine's dad is the boss. It makes us feel so left out and the worst thing is only managers will talk to us. And sometimes, this is how fake the society can be. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah I'm so tired and I hope this whole thing ends soon.

Good night ppl.

P.S. I think I shouldn't have even cared in the first place.
P.S.S. Dearest sweetheart, after all these, are you still siding your good friend? You don’t have to put in any more good words for him `cause I think he doesn’t deserve it. He is not even doing anything about it!
P.S.S.S. Man United got into the final 8. :) Ronaldo scoring the only goal in Old Trafford!

2008-03-02T21:45:00.016+08:00

I'm back to blogging after 100000 years! Hehe so attachment has already started. I think by now, you guys should know I'm working at Sheng Shiong Supermarket Headquarters which is located at Woodlands. (-.-) I take 1.5 hour to travel to work everyday. Yes cry for me please. :( However, on a brighter note, I get to see my dearest woman, Jasmine Lin everyday. D: hehe!

Last Saturday (23/3), I had my second clubbing experience. Sophina's bday celebration at MOS. We went to demsey's place at Holland Village first. Then finally to MOS to meet her other friends. Some pictures here to share! :D

me and eric!

sophinaaaa and me :)

sop's ben & jerry's bday cake (so prettayeee rite!)

andreeeeeewxx, the billionaire boy and me!

Okay me again, in case you`ll miss me! :D

I realised clubbing is seriously so not for me please. I felt so terrible every moment I stepped onto the dance floor! So many people getting high and smoking. Okay enough about clubbing! :)

Claudia went to Liverpool for her attachment already! That silly woman! It's difficult to even find and talk to her online because of the huge time difference. Most importantly, Man Utd won 3-0 and Arsenal drew. It means Arsenal is only leading by 1 point now! :D

I don't know what I ought to do next. Maybe I should just listen to Sop's advice! Orights nights world, I've to go bed now! I'll be back to blog frequently okie! :D

2008-02-21T23:40:00.003+08:00

So what if I still do? Does that mean a single thing anymore? Can it even mean anything anymore? Wake up, I really have to wake up. I can be such a stubborn girl at times. ): I'm emo tonight due to 10000000000 reasons. So many things, events and people are running through my mind again and again. I've to much to tell you guys but I guess I'll blog after my exams! :0

Good night world. :D

2008-02-04T01:44:00.000+08:00

I remember, how your eyes revealed your hidden feelings and emotions so easily read by me. I hope she knows this as well. I remember, how well you disguised them, but through all the facades, I still see. I hope she can tell. I remember, the sadness lurking behind your smiles, and we both know something's out of place. I hope she's truly the missing puzzle in your life. I remember, all your problems, fears and things that are unrevealed by your face. I hope she listens and shares all your ups and downs. I remember, how I sensed something is wrong, yet you continued persisting that you were very fine. I hope she keeps you safe. I remember, how we tried to give our best but yet we still felt so distant away from each other. I hope she'll manage to find her way into your very much guarded heart. I remember how I used to watch Arsenal match religiously just because I wanted to update you your favourite club’s score line. I hope she understands how much soccer means to you. I remember, all the things I did unconsciously, hurt you and caused you so much pain. I hope she knows all these and handles your heart well.

I feel that there is a need to blog about these, because after so long I think I still owe you two words which I didn't had a chance to let you know. Thank you. You taught me how to long unselfishly and be stronger. I'm no longer the little girl you knew 2 years ago and I've grown up. And no matter what, I still want you to be the happiest. I thank you for all memories because I know all these memories would make me smile to myself even after 50 years. I'll hold them close to my heart and full stop. I wish you all the best from the bottom of my heart. :)

Anyway, Friday was our last official tutorial for year 2. The worst thing is I didn't even realised. It wasn't until Jane reminded me, I thought we still have a lot of time, keep thinking times will never change and we'll never grow up. ): And this time, it is not just parting with classmates, but with my dearest woman, JASMINE LIN. God knows how much I rely on her. She is my first and best friend in poly. I can't imagine how days would be like without her. She is much more than a best fren, a soul mate to me and our friendship means so much, so much, so much to me. I'm feeling emo about this whole issue tonight. And I meant it, I can't find the right words to use. So for now, I'm going to leave it and when I feel better, I'll carry on about this issue again.

GOODNIGHT PPL.

2008-01-31T14:44:00.000+08:00

I'm sitting all alone, stoning at the Atrium with my laptop and waiting for the attachment briefing to start at 4pm. Can you imagine I've been sitting here since 1pm! ~!@#$%^& that is a good 3 hours alone. ): The reason why I'm left alone is because Jasmine has to teach tuition at 2pm, Jane doesn't have to attend the briefing since she had already completed her attachment last semester & the rest of the gals are still having IS class! And I didn't want to join the guys. Some of them went town, the rest of them went IMM (Jurong). I know if I join them, I won't feel like coming back at all! Tsktsk.

I really have to show you guys something! Man United won Portsmouth 2-0. Wait, this is not the main point! I mean Man United has been winning so regularly that it is nothing new when they win again right! My main point here is Ronaldo scored twice again this morning to bring Man United back to the top of the league again! And please people, watch his second goal, a truly world class free kick. I seriously think he is bending like Beckham. And it's even scarier to know that he is only in his early twenties. His career is only beginning! :)

MANCHESTER UNITERD vs PORTSMOUTH (2-0)

I'm quite certain that you're equally amazed after watching the clip! :) Beautiful free kick, wasn't it! My all time ultimate lover! :D

Okay another little one who cheers me up always.

My favourite nephew even though he likes to act cute at times and can be really annoying for e.g. pulling your hair when you are rushing pw or report. But still <3 (:

Okay hope Jasmine comes back soon `cause I'm dying! :(

2008-01-28T23:49:00.000+08:00

My cousin is disgusting to the max. She got 8 points for O's. :S Lol, I don't understand why such smart people exist in my family. Nevertheless, I'm still happy for her. :)

Anyway, life has been good to me in many ways. And I'm just plain lazy to type them all out. :D

The four sisters at my public performance @ SCH. :)

KC, Germaine & I when we were in Sec 4. (Exactly 3 years ago!) I think I look way better then! WHY AH!!!

Can't you see I'm a fool in so many ways? I think you should not waste your precious time and effort because you certainly deserve someone better. Ultimately, you'll realised that all these actions ain't worth anything, including me. Don't place too much hopes on me, cause in the end, I won't live up to your expectations. You should know, I can't commit, I can't even give you anything back in return. I'm so sorry. And these are the only 4 words I can offer, nothing more.

To end this post,

I guess I don't have to tell you how crazily in love I'm with myself. :) My dad thought that I'm super zilian when he saw my display picture. He even asked me if I want to make a poster of myself and paste it in my room. I mean I wouldn't mind right! HAHA. :)

NIGHTS. <3

2008-01-21T01:48:00.000+08:00

You know, it's times like these that makes me realised how much you gals meant to me. :) And words ain't good enough to describe anything.

I'm tired of acting strong when I'm not and I decided I just want to come clean. I'm only human, and I yearn for a refreshment, a breakthrough. And it all starts from here. :) So tired of commitments, never ending projects, tutorials, but I'm not the only one. In fact, everyone is busy, stressed and tired. Although there are still a lot on my mind and my heart's not settled at all; feel helpless but still, I won't despair. Thanks for all your assurance when I needed them all! It meant so much to me, really. :D

And it's also times like these that show me what I do need and do not need right now.

(: smile & tmr will be a better day!

2008-01-14T01:37:00.000+08:00

<33333333333333 all who've came down yesterday!

Let the pictures do all the talking. :D

Me and JK on our journey back school. :D

Me and Claudia :)

Me and Chrispin! (We look damn alike rite? So many ppl asked me and her if we're sisters or cousins. Hehe!)

Me and Teng Yeow!

Jiunn Yuan, me and Zhi zhong!

Me and Ivan (Student Conductor)

Me and Ming Kai

Me and Kelvin (My damn funny & Zhong Ruan Partner!)

Me and Sheng Xuan! (My very very very very nice buddy!)

Me and Adrian! (Percussion Guy)

Okay I've still got lots and tons of pics all over the world. :) Hope to get it ASAP and continue blogging k! :)

P.S. :) Thanks for making my day such a wonderful one. Thanks for being there forever when I need someone to lean and rely on. <3
P.S.S. I love CO more and more after today!
P.S.S.S. I feel I'm the luckiest gal on Earth.
P.S.S.S.S. You know, I think you're the best during the whole performance! :)

Nights everyoneeeeeeeeeeee. :) LOVES!

EDITED
Over you- Chris Daughtry

Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

You took a hammer to these walls,
Dragged the memories down the hall,
Packed your bags and walked away.
There was nothing I could say.
And when you slammed the front door shut,
A lot of others opened up,
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

Well, I never saw it coming.*
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
Well I'm putting my heart back together,
'Cause I got over you.
Well I got over you.
I got over you.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

and I guess it fits how I'm feeling absolutely! But seriously, it's a nice song! :)

2008-01-13T01:25:00.001+08:00

A lot of things are on my mind. I don't know if it's just me, feeling like this in the middle of the night or what. But projects, tutorials, CO practices, tuitions, commitments, late night sleeps are driving me nuts. I struggle too, I'm just like you and all the other human race. I want to clear the air. I need to feel relief for a while.

But you know what, I'm still grateful and happy to everything even though life is like a never-ending nonsense. Hehe. :D

Okay wish me luck tmr. :) & ppl who are coming down to support me, thanks. :) I love you guys.

Don't be too nice to me. I don't deserve it at all. You know if you continue like this, the person who would be feeling miserable at the end of the day will definitely you. Yeah, I'm sorry. Not as if you going to read this, but I just feel bad about it.

2008-01-09T21:21:00.000+08:00

想听的话得不到回答, 我却还在独自装傻, 学不会摆脱这挣扎.

2008-01-06T02:53:00.001+08:00

I've decided to forbid some ppl from reading my blog cause I feel that they don't understand me at all and they don't have to know more about my life. Haha, so if you can still enter this blog, it only goes to show how much I like you okay! :)

Jane's MSN nick: My love will get you home
In response to Jane's nick, this is my nick: Your love will get me there. Haha, so lame.

You know as days pass gradually, I love this gal more and more. How? I'm getting so attached to my class! Jasmine, Jane & Nezeem, I will never forget the times we ponned lectures together (okay, maybe only Jas & I only), the times we rushed projects, trying to meet deadlines like crazy, the times when we played bball in sandals and short skirts, the times we ran to canteen and eat, eat, eat, so much more to mention!

I've sorted out my thoughts. Yes but after dunno how long. Call me a fool, stupid, idiot, blind for all you like, I don't care and mind. Because after tonight, I'm beginning to think I'm one. No, I should use I WAS one. Yup, it should be in past tense from tonight onwards and I won't care any further. Do things that suit you, it doesn't really matter to me anymore.

Because I think it's time to put a stop to these.
Because there's a limit to everything, especially my patience and you're definitely pushing it.
Because it still hurts, being so far apart from you.
Because I can't face all the excuses that you spin up just to break me down.
Because I certainly can't watch further. It's crushing my heart to watch.
Because I realised I've spent too much time dwelling and indulging in my old past.
Because I've been having and thinking of too many 'if only', way too many.
Because I hate the anticipation of meeting, msning someone.
Because I dislike how our occasional chats made me smile.
Because saying how we really feel is no longer allowed.
Because if I carry on any further, I know I will miss your captivating smile that will only appear in my memories now.

And so much so for not listening to my heart, I've learnt my lesson through the hard way. With a heart as heavy as the rain retaliating against my window panes, optimism becomes a harder pill to swallow than you are. But believe me, I'll be all fine. :)

Okay back to FIT project. Nights!

2008-01-03T23:21:00.000+08:00

3 days into Year 2008, and I guess it isn't all too late to post my new year resolutions right?

Year 2008 Resolutions
1) Show more love & concern to my family. (I think it's pretty obvious why this is my first resolution on my list this year. ♥ cause ultimately, they are the one who will stand by me when the world tumbles.)
2) Get all my A's this semester.
3) Obtain my driving license ASAP.
4) Learn Japanese well. :)
5) Get Guzheng Diploma @ NAFA soon.
6) Be punctual, don't be late anymore. (HAHAHA!)
7) Treasure all my loved ones and not to take them for granted. (I'm so sorry. I guess I've taken some ppl for granted at times.)
8) Be an independent woman, more optimistic, forgiving, understanding, loving. (I think it's time to stop relying on ppl. :P)
9) Stay 45kg-50kg (Please don't get out of the range, or I will die!)
10) Save at least $______k by the end of the year.

That's all for now. :) I hope these are realistic enough, and im looking forward to see a better me in this year.

Anyway, daddy got me my precious darling! :) 6500 Classic.

It's awesome & prettayeeeeee. :) I gonna get a new Sony camera soon! Any recommendations ppl?

It seems that I'm particularly sad that Year 2007 ended, probably because I feel somehow what attached to last year, I don't want to move on. Too many memories left to be embraced, and yes I'm totally left in amazement how fast last year had passed.

PROJECTS ARE KILLING ME & MY GROUP. :( I hate how we spent New Year's eve and New Year rushing them.

Okay, back to PW then. Nights lovelies. :)

replies
Yiying: Hehe sweetheart! I promise I'll come out more often okie. & I where got loner? :S lol. I miss you girls too. :D
Jasper: Haha, a better year ahead for you too! and maybe with Ms Lxx, you know who ah! shhhh. :P
LC: Thanks my dearest. <3 you to the power of billions.
Tim & Joseph: Haha, thanks ah. And how to I shine if I'm not the Sun? (Okay sorry, lame. Lol.) Both of you know that I really appreciate you guys lah. :)

2007-12-30T01:05:00.000+08:00

Each time you log onto MSN, I'd click on your ever familiar, never-changed nick and proceed on to staring at the blank space for at least five minutes. I wish you would initiate a conversation with me but well, why am I even wishing. Now that it's all said and done, maybe there aren't anything else or even a common topic for us to talk about anymore. You wouldn't believe how many times I actually backspaced in the chat box; twiddling with my fingers, hoping and trying to find some random subject or even the appropriate sentence to start a conversation. But I aren't sure how your reaction would be like or maybe, I don't want things to be even more awkward. Or 'comon maybe I'm just scared of facing reality. So here I'm trying to play it cool and pretend like I don't even care, big deal when everyone knows I care the most. Who am I kidding, please I think that I'm a lousy loser. And I seriously hate that lousy feeling. Kick me to Old Trafford please. (Okay, I'm kidding here!)

Man United lost to West Ham 2-1. I guess there goes our 1 point lead, a lousy way to start the new year. But no worries, I've faith that Man United will bounce back okie!

Here's my conversation with Kenneth L.
Bulit to Last says (1:09 AM):
hope that everton can do United a favour
❤ ZHIYAN; says (1:11 AM):
yes yes yes yes yes yes
❤ ZHIYAN; says (1:11 AM):
I promise I'll love them more
Bulit to Last says (1:12 AM):
i promise to be a good boy for the new year 8-|
❤ ZHIYAN; says (1:12 AM):
HAHAHAH so act cute please!

Kenneth promises to be a good boy for 2008? We shall wait and see! Lol. :P

Nights world. :)

2007-12-28T00:49:00.000+08:00

FIRSTLY, HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY TO LC. (Shld be on the 27th thurs)
Stay pretty & happy babe. <3 you to the power of billions. :)

Me and my brother at Sushi Tei! :D

I'm a happy gal tonight! :D

P.S. My Man United is top of the table now.
P.S.S. I received the best Christmas gift tonight. (belated one though, lol.)
P.S.S.S. I still can't decide where to go on the 31st. (So many different gatherings & ppl to hang out with.)
P.S.S.S.S. I think I'm in love with you. :P

2007-12-24T14:26:00.000+08:00

On the 21st November, I told myself that this would be the last time I cried, at least for this particular thing. And I will never let it happen again. But I was wrong, not just wrong but terribly wrong.

到今天才知道，说再见需要多么坚强和勇气。
只怕，我没有。。。

2007-12-20T14:52:00.000+08:00

Hari Raya Haji♥, how sweet. Public holiday and I had a good break today. I just don't feel like doing anything already. (I promised my mum that I will pack my messy room!)

I shall blog about what I had been doing for the past few days.

Monday- I had a great family gathering at granny's place. :) A place where I can seek comfort, happiness and joy. I don't know what to do without them. I think I shall upload some pictures soon after my cousin sends me on MSN.

Tuesday- Went to tighten my braces in the morning. <3 Dad! My appointment was at 9am and he sent me there so I wouldn't have to wake up so early. Tuition again in the afternoon. I had a bad day on that day. Haha, lovelies! You all should know by now, never never call me or sms me when I just made my trip to the dentist! :P I wanted to sms someone so much because the pain is killing me! However, before I could do so, that someone msn me! :) And it made my night.

Wednesday- Tuition in the morning. Then I had a family gathering dinner @ Sushi Tei (Vivo). The food was a great disappointment, I would rather go Sakae. Anyway, I saw Xinyi and her BF. She actually tot Uncle Peter was my BF. -.-" And all of us went to watch The Golden Compass at 10pm. The movie was good, but I expected it to be better, way better.

This is what you called a holiday. :( So busy and so packed with endless tuition. And and and I've project meeting on the 28th. :S What a way to end my holidays! And I miss my woman, Jasmine Lin. She is coming back from Vietnam today! :D

Friday- Tuition in the morning. And my dad will be taking leave because of my brother's orientation! We'll be go shopping + movie + buffet after that. It has been quite some time since all of us watched a movie together! :D Anyway, my brother's books cost a bomb please. 600 bucks for Sec 1? Ridiculously ex. And he has to buy graphic calculator. I tot only JC students have to buy!!! :S AAAAAAAAAh. I hope my brother will learn to treasure and cherish loved ones/things. :)

Saturday- Tuition till 5pm. SSS Show @ MediaCorp 630pm. I will be seeing Jas Lin! :D

Sunday- Tuition in the morning. Then going down to Suntec's bookfair!

The sky fell in holding you close how I always held close in your fear
remembering you runing soft through the night you were bigger and brighter than the snow
screamed at the make-believe screamed at the
sky and you finally found all your courage to let it all go.

There was nothing in the world that I wanted more than to feel you deep in my heart
There was nothing in the world that I ever wanted more than to feel the never breaking apart.

What does one do when they find themselves caught between two worlds of opposing desires? When pursuing one means forgoing the other which means the world, yet you know this is the right option. But how can something so right feel so wrong? If laying down my desires only escalates the pain, the heart wrenching process of looking beyond the glass realising how things have changed. So many sleepless nights and tears and impulsive urges, a temper unknown to myself even and that scares me to no end. Something so simple becomes something so irrational and abnormal. I wonder, do all these still mean something to you? I wonder, do you still care? I wonder, do you feel the same way too?

Christmas is coming, and for once, once. I pray that it wouldn't come so soon.

2007-12-18T22:10:00.000+08:00

我要控制我自己
不会让谁看见我哭泣
装作漠不关心你
不愿想起你
怪自己没有勇气
心痛得无法呼吸
找不到你留下的痕迹
眼睁睁的看着你
却无能为力
任你消失在世界的尽头
找不到坚强的理由
再也感觉不到你的温柔
告诉我星空在那头
那里是否有尽头
就向流星许个心愿
让你知道我爱你

Hmm, has been one of my favourite song since Secondary school. I remember it was LC's favourite chinese song too. I don't know why I'm blogging this song tonight. Anyway, after 1000000 days, I'm finally online again! :D Hehe. I've been so busy and tired that I didn't have the time to come online. Tuition, tuition and tuition EVERY DAY. Omgwaaaaaaaaaad and Yang called me today. Obviously she was damn pissed with Claudia and I for not going CO tonight. :(

NIGHTS PEOPLE. I don't feel good tonight.

2007-12-16T13:54:00.000+08:00

Finally, I'm back online again after a horrible torturous CT week. However everytime I attempt type an entry, I give up and click the tiny x at the top right hand corner of the window dialogue box. I can't find the right words to say, or rather the sentences to sum up what has been happening.

Don't look back; for there's always a better tmr. I do not know how to convince myself. I just can't digress, I'm having a hard time handling these thoughts in my mind cause' it's really making me rewind & turn back time.

I'm sorry I can't express myself well. I know I'm blunt with my words but I really appreciate what you did - I'm really trying to understand you, I really am. And if I looked as though I do not care a single bit, then sorry you're wrong. I care and care the most. There are still so many 'what ifs' flooding in my mind. I wonder, wonder and wonder. But `comon, please tell me to stop all that nonsense.

On a lighter note, I will be back tmr to blog about my holiday schedule so my lovelies can date me out. :D But please do not date me on Christmas Eve, thank you. (Not as though alot of ppl gonna date me out, but still HEHEHE. I think I'll have a busy holiday soon!)

REPLIES
Xinyi: Babe, let's go out soon! :) Haha, but you're sick of town, aren't you? Then how ah? Lol.
Joseph: Eh, m'sia okay leh, but no pictures. Thanks to my bro. Seeing you soon, we've to send Jonathan off soon! But before that, I think we are having a Christmas gathering. -.- And my public performance. :)
Sammy: Thanks darling. I hope CTs went well for you. :)
Germaine: Thank you woman. Please come for my public performance hor. Booked you gals alr. :)
Jasper: Yeah, and you still have 1 more year with Ms xxx. Lol, kidding. Class outing soon okie! Dan Teo, please organise one if you read this. x)
Jasmine Tan: I know it's definitely you, cos my Jasmine Lin will never ever tag my blog. Lol, and erm for your info, Liverpool alr dropped to the 5th position in the League `cause Man city won. Hmm, tonight they gonna drop even further to 6th `cause Man Utd is winning this one. :) I'm watching it at CHIJMES anyway. :)

Don't look back; for there's always a better tomorrow.

2007-12-12T13:16:00.000+08:00

I miss my Sec 4 class. Can you guys find me? Lol (First row, first from the left) I look even more like a china woman in my secondary school days can. :S

Jasper and I during our year 1 days. Haha.

When we were doing group project in Year 1, Jasper used my phone to take pictures of Clement and I doing some calculations. And make it as though we were having some scandalous affair. -.- He tried doing the same thing on Jasmine and Clement too. Lol, He is really good with camera or IT stuffs okay. :S

Me and shirley in Genting!

Me, Shirley, Jasper & Jiasin. I still remember I refused to sit corkscrew with them and I nearly cried. But in the end, they convinced me to. We sit numerous times please. Because we wanted to take a nice group picture! :) Haha! So this is the best picture we get. (We were actually smiling looking at the camera, when corkscrew was going down. Omgwaaaaad lah! I don't think I have the courage to sit it again!)

Jiasin, Shirley & me

Jiasin (So cuteeee please, we were trying to play some random and stupid game.)

Shirley, me & Clement

Nicole, me & Shirley again.

Me and Serhwee.

The 4 sisters again. Lol. I think this was taken on my 17th birthday at Swensen's. AND GERMAINE LOW YU SHI. I'm jealous! You tagged in Jasmine Tan's blog, but not mine lehhhhhhhhhhhs! :( So what laaaaaaah!

You know, I really do miss my past so much. I miss my Sec 3/4 class, my Secondary school days, my poly year 1 class... ... So many, so much that I've missed. I was disappointed in human frailness and how a perfectly strong, confident person gets so easily swiped off his or her feet to become literally… a mess. But then you live, you learn, you laugh after. And, you get stronger. You learn who’s worth your time, who’s not even worth a memory. You learn about the other things in life that were there all along you just never bothered to pay any attention to. And precious ppl who were in your life all the time, just that, it's just that you were so busy clinging on to your lousy past that you failed to realise that they were there all along.

Should have done something
but I've done enough

Should have said something
but I've said enough

REPLIES
Thanks to all of you who have tagged! :) A big love! Anyway, I do not have Malaysia's pictures. My brother was holding on to the camera all the time, taking his own pictures. :S I want to get a new digital camera soon. Any models to recommend me? I think I would prefer Sony.

Okay back to studying. :) 2 more papers to go. Wish me luck, will you? :D

2007-12-06T23:09:00.000+08:00

Warning, a super long post ahead. Read only if you've the time, lol.
I'm supposed to send my picture and introduction for the Public Performance's programme list (节目表) to Ivan (Ex-President of CO). And I'm super bothered and frustrated with it. Firstly, I can't seem to find a nice picture of myself. It is either not nice or the picture is slanted. Secondly, I do not know how to photoshop. I wished I had LC with me when I needed her. :( That woman rocks the most when it comes to these type of things! But thank god, the problem was solved, by my dearest Jas Tan. :) Thirdly, I do not know what I can/should/ought/have/need to write for introduction. Not as if I've lots of good testimonials or awards, but still it's difficult. I think I'm getting too stressed up, no thanks to common tests. Omgwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad, I really really really want to do well for this CT. My msn is screwed up. I keep signing in and out till Uncle Peter msned me and told me he is going to block me. :S Lol, obviously he was kidding lah!

I also think I'm suffering from compulsive shopping disorder again. I just added 10 pieces to my wardrobe within 4 days. :S I need to start saving up soon!

I just had a good talk with daddy. It has been quite some time since both of us had the time to sit down, with a cup of hot chocolate (For him, obviously coffee! Hehe!) and have a decent talk. And all of a sudden, I'm a little overwhelmed with his affection. I mean I know how much he loves me and this family all along but it is that kind of familiar feeling that makes me very comfortable with the surrounding at that point of time. I feel as though I can tell him everything in the world and share with him every single little bit of my life. And I can tell you, I secretly wished that our talk would just continue, till next morning, till forever.

My dad is not the most admirable person in my life. And he is definitely not the most perfect father or husband but he is a man who loves his family tonnes & tonnes & tonnes. My dad is one of the nicest person in the world- I have never heard him said anything mean/sarcastic/racist/selfish. He, who is always immaculately dressed, is the one who taught me manners and etiquette. He is the person who loves me the most, ever. He is my loving father who calls me almost daily just to ask, "What are you doing, baby?" His love for me shows in his eyes, his expressions, his face and his actions everytime he speaks of the fond memories of me when I was young. And he is definitely one of the biggest reason why I had so many wonderful childhood memories. Not just his love for me, touches my soul within. But his love for my mum, my brother and his whole family. :) I feel lousy for the times I took my dad for granted, for the times I was rude to him, for the times I refused to pick up his calls, for the times when I haven't been understanding to him and for the many times that I sided with my mum. As much as I do not treat him with the due respect he deserves, my dad is, in every aspect, the most tolerant to me.

Not as if he will see this but I just want to say I love you, my beloved dad. I love you very much.

Sometimes I wish to see the world simply and plainly. You know, just live life not caring about change, the past, indifference, all that. Just living. Living simply day to day. Being content at the simple things, being okay with everything, not questioning and wishing, hoping at all. But then again, we humans always have something to complain about. It all boils down to choices. Your future and life is determined by the choices you make. Perhaps, a choice to sacrifice/give up would do me good. But strangely no matter how much it pains to think of memories, we can't seem to let go of them. Well, at least I can't. You don't ever forget things. It just takes a while for you to remember. And perhaps a lifetime, you'd never know.

Anyway, public performance is on 13th January 2008 at Singapore Conference Hall. People, please come and watch okay, if not see me also can! :)
And Jasper, as if you would want to come all the way just to see me perform. Actually you want to see Ms xxx xxxxx right! :) Gotcha!

ENCHANTED
You're in my arms
And all the world is gone
The music playing on
For only two
So close togehter

And when I'm with you
So close to feeling alive

A life goes by
Romantic dreams must die
So I bid mine goodbye
And never knew
So close was waiting
Waiting here with you
And now, forever, I know
All that I want is to hold you
So close

So close to reaching
That famous happy and
Almost believing
This one's not pretend
Now you're beside me
And look how far we've come
So far
We are
So close...

Oh, how could I face the faceless days
If I should lose you now?

We're so close to reaching
That famous hapyp end
Almost believing
This one's not pretend
Let's go on dreaming
Though we know we are
So close
So close, and still
So far...

So close to reaching, but still so far. ):
Nights world.